Happy New Year from the opressed and humiliated

Quentin and Shane chose to honor the great city of New Orleans this New Year's Eve by sporting masquerade masks and Mardi Gras beads.

Merry Christmas! Happy New Year! And all of it!

Jocelyn with Great-Grandma Jo
Originally uploaded by Monkey loves Kitten.

Yes, I know that I have once again been remiss in posting. I know that I gave you no warning and have likely caused much frustration on your part. I know how you've come to rely on me to keep you entertained and informed and that you likely feel I've let you down. All of this I know.

Okay, for those of you I didn't lose with that paragraph, I'm sitting in the airport in San Francisco, killing time before my next flight. It leaves here the same time I was originally scheduled to get home. Due to bad weather in San Francisco, my flight from Monterey was delayed enough where I would've missed my earlier connection, the one I'm waiting for now was the next happening. I now get home tomorrow morning and have a mere five hours here at SFO. All I can say is, thank goodness for Anchor Steam.

Oh, and please enjoy this photo of Jocelyn with her Great-Grandma Jo. They sure enjoyed one another.

Merry Christmas

Merry Christmas from Iraqistan!
Miss you all,
b

Okay, I'll tell you who they are

Santa is Chuck, husband of Sue, my primary babysitter. By which I mean the woman who watches me a couple of days a week.

More elfin adventures

Got a couple of shots off before Mrs. Claus took back the elf ensemble.

See the kind of trouble I'm getting into?

Puppy Woofmas

Car dogs

Merry Christmas from the desert

New and improved niece

Now with tons of hair!

Added to include

And then my dad said, "Unlevity bread is no laughing batter." And it just goes on. Speaking of my dad, here is a new shot of Grandpa Scott with Jocelyn.

I'm so looking forward to getting my hands (and teeth) on her! I'll be at my parents for Christmas* so I won't have to wait much longer. Baby Noah gets a reprieve for the time being. That's okay, a few months of leg plumping will make for a better chomp. :)

*Thank you, husband!

Good show

Thanks to all who commented on the previous post. It's safe to say I know some freaks.

Here's an exchange between me and my favorite freak that happened today:

I'd written an email with a bunch of smilies. He asked what that was.

Me: That was levity.
Him: I thought that was what makes bread rise.
Me: Doh!
Him: yeah. That stuff. Turns into bread when you bake it and use a levity agent.
Me: I cannot believe I just handed that to you, right on a silver platter. Yes, that thing upon which the aforementioned bread may be served. Got it.

Strange behavior

Time to get interactive, people. I tell you something weird I do, and you tell me something weird you do. Here goes:

I like to keep only and exactly 99 cents in my coin purse. Theoretically that's the most I'd need, right? I keep three quarters, one* dime, two nickels, and four pennies. I have each denomination represented and can therefore come up with any amount between one and ninety-nine.

Okay, your turn. Oh, and don't make fun of me and I won't make fun of you. Well, at least I won't write about it.

*** A correction brought to my attention by my college friend, Nicolle. I really only do keep one dime, I'd mistakenly written "two." Thank you for your acceptance.

Sleep

Those who know me well know that I have made it my life's work to not get enough sleep. With only a very few exceptions, I have been quite succesful.

As a child, I refused to nap. At a small, in-home daycare, I used naptime to break into the fridge and hand out snacks to the other captives. The next daycare, a larger place, attempted to deal with my disruptive naptime ways by partitioning my cot, and when that didn't keep me from keeping other kids awake, moving me to a room by myself to color.

I refused to go to sleep at a reasonable hour, sneaking out of bed to watch Benny Hill. No wonder I couldn't sleep with those images in my head! Then, in the morning, proved to be beyond challenging to wake. Except of course for Saturdays and Christmas. The two surefire ways to get kids up early - cartoons and Santa. That's some kind of cruel irony for the parents, isn't it?

Once a teen, I still stayed up far too late, but then didn't sleep in like so many of my friends did. Surprisingly my growth wasn't stunted by my lack of self-care. My mom thought I was anemic, but it was just the lack of sleep that caused me to look so crappy.

So, now I am an adult. Of the age when tired catches up to you. I am tired many days, but don't you think for a minute that I'm doing anything about it. In fact, I've found more reasons to stay up too late all thanks to the Internet. Instant messaging with a west-coast friend until it's her bedtime, no problem! Waiting until my husband gets to his office so we can email back and forth several times, easy. He's only eight hours ahead after all. Gets to work when a prudent me would be heading to bed. And I still don't sleep in. Blame this on the dogs. As soon as Shane senses that I'm awake, she comes over to nudge my hand. Sometimes Quentin lick, lick, licks and wakes me up. If I holler at him to stop, Shane'll know I'm up, so I pull a pillow over my head. Can't get back to sleep though, so up I get and begin another day for which I am unprepared. But if I wasn't this dedicated and focused, I wouldn't be able to reach five o'clock looking like I just. got. up.

More importantly

What's more important than boots, you ask? Well, this baby for one. We are aunt and uncle again - that's twice in one month! We're pretty lucky. Kim and Justin welcomed Noah Robert yesterday afternoon. He is 7lbs, 2ozs and 20in long. He was also 12 days late. See, I was in town until the day before he was born and I guess he just really wanted to avoid me. Musta heard that I'm a baby biter. Well, he can't avoid my choppers forever!
BEFORE






AFTER

Boot Casserole

Okay, sorry I was remiss. Here are the boots. They are not of the super sassy variety, but of the dry, functional, still pass as fashionable variety. And the dish I made was a sweet potato pudding. It's made of shredded sweet potatoes, cream, butter, and brown sugar. This concoction is then baked until it becomes pudding like. It is certainly quite healthy. What, you doubt me? I had gone to a Thanksgiving dinner at the Catholic church with some of my neighbor friends and that's what I took. At least I was the only one with that particular variation.

Boots

You know how sometimes you are going to an event and you are bringing a hot dish to share (hot dish as in temperature, not necessarily a casserole) and you're left wondering how you're going to safely transport said dish? Well, tell you what, buy a new pair of boots and you are set.

On the road again

Just in time for my full day of driving, the rain began again. I woke up yesterday to find it had rained all night and discovered as my day elapsed that the rain was not to stop.

Well, I left the kids with their jailers just before 10 am and headed east on 70 to Raleigh. I stopped at the state's farmers' market there where I found this little piggy girl.

From there I continued east to Greensboro on 40 where I picked up 85 to Greenville, SC. I continued east from there to my final destination near Clemson. Just after I passed there and darkness had settled and I began to need to pay close attention to my directions, the volume of rain increased. A lot. I was white-knucking it and probably negated the positive effects of last week's massage. Gah. But, I made it in good time and incident free and in time for cocktail hour, so all in all, a good day.

Speaking of blazing...

My old town is on fire, again. The hills above downtown Ventura lit the pre-dawn sky with flames Friday morning. I saw a picture online that looked a lot like the view I had from my living room window ten years ago. I tell ya, it's a bizarre situation when you can look out of your window or at the television and see the same thing. That fire was contained before any structures or lives were lost. Hopefully this one will also be. Those of you who've lived in southern California know all about those untrustworty Santa Ana winds. They really take "fanning the flame" to heart.

The latest.

dogsense

I don't blow my hair dry much these days, no real need, not going anywhere. So, at first I didn't realize that it was the dryer that was making the dog bark. I thought maybe the doorbell had rung and I couldn't hear it. I went to investigate - nothing. It happened the next time, and I assumed it was Quentin since he's the loudmouth. The other day I was drying and I heard barking and lo and behold, it was Shane. Now, she's the one who is more curious than scared when it comes to the vacuum, so why bark at the blow dryer? Maybe it's a sound frequency issue. If so, maybe the food processor is on the same frequency because I was just using it and she was just barking. When she barks, Quentin barks, but he doesn't know what at, so he wanders around looking for something. Aimless toughy.

Brrr

I wrote Brandon that it's cold enough now that I can see the dogs' breath when we're out walking, even at 9 in the morning. He wrote back, "Puppy breath. Stinky clouds of love!" So true, so true.

Busy week!

I spent about 14 hours at the local public radio station over the last two days. I was volunteering with two big mailings. I used to do lots of those at my last job. I missed the paper cuts so much I decided to do it here for free!

The time I put in yesterday and today, added to the hours I spent there Monday making gift baskets, earned me a spiffy cap embroidered with "Volunteer." I got the goods, time to move on.

Last night's fun

Well. Sue and Evelyn picked me up at 4:45. From here we grabbed Jan, who was subbing for Carol. We headed downtown and slowed enough to get Patty, who'd been at an art class. After that is was on to the cooking demonstration! It was pretty fun, a bag full of coupons and a cookbook, a full-blown demo on stage, lots of door prizes. Oh! Did I mention I won a door prize, well, I did. A silver mesh box full of stuff. And by stuff I mean crap. Well, some is useful, to be fair, but the box is the best part of the deal. I got a notepad, a pillbox, a coozy, a highlighter, flashlight, and some bandages. My friends were sure I'd win something, and they were right. I made sure they didn't forget how right they were. As we piled back into the car, there was some concern that if we all put our bags in the trunk, we'd get them mixed up. I said I'd know which was mine, it had a prize in it!

My patron and my muse

And I am so lucky to have found either, let alone both in the same man. A belated Veterans' Day to you, Captain.


The Euphrates.

These pictures were taken by someone else. I don't know who, but credit is due.

Sunday fun

Took the dogs to the mini-mart so I could get a paper. They sell individual biscuits there so I got them a couple and they set right to them. I'd handed them over from the other side of the car, but this seemed to be the best position for each to really sink their teeth in, so to speak. We may have to make a habit of it.

I don't know why it took me so long to notice

I've been shopping at this grocery store since we got here. No excuse, really, for me not to have seen it sooner.
Sorry it's not the clearest pic, I was trying to be sneaky.

Night out

Patty, Sue, and Evelyn picked me up at 5:30 and we headed out to an Italian place for dinner before the show. These gals are Italian-American Catholics from the Bronx. They are hilarious. Sue must be first generation as she often says a word in Italian as she's remembering the English for it. They reminisced about roller skates and skating skirts and a rink they all went to in their old neighborhood. They laughed as they shared stories of "discipline" and how they'd met their husbands. They chuckled at the story of how I met Brandon and the pizza incident, but I know it didn't hold a candle. We met another three at the restaurant and the group proceeded to torture the poor waitress. Service wasn't fast enough, separate checks for all, you get the drift. It was one of those nights where you slip a couple extra bucks on the table as you slink out.

Although we had gone to dinner plenty early, we still got to the theater a minute late and clunked up to our balcony seats while the orchestra was playing. The production was pretty good, some outstanding singing, some not so hot. Unfortunately the seats were hard and the family sitting right in front of us consisted of a tall, broad young man with big hair, his excruciatingly fidgety older sister, her two adolescent daughters (best behaved of the group), her sleeping husband, and another young man. Every one of these that were awake leaned forward for most of the show, effectively obscuring the view for those behind. The fidgety woman alternated between obscuring the view and simply distracting those behind her with the nonstop movement. They had additional family including her parents in another row and, at every opportunity, she asked them if they could see by miming. This mime involved pointed to her own forehead (third eye?) and then the stage. The theater has cushions for each seat, but people had taken two, and since we were late, we had none. This led Evelyn to exclaim on the ride home that her "ass" was killing her. Did I mention how fun these gals are? Next date is Tuesday!

So many things!

Today is a special day. It's Veterans Day. It's Armistice Day. It's Remembrance Day. It's Kurt Vonnegut's birthday. It's Grandma Jo's birthday. And, it's the first Friday I have plans with my new lady friends! Can't talk long, have to get going. They're picking me up at 5:30, so the evening routine with the dogs is bumped up an hour. Then, I have to get ready. Luckily I laid out my outfit, including accessories, two nights ago. Do I sound desperate? Ha ha ha ha ha!

Hold the phone! Stop the presses!

Presenting Jocelyn Charisma, born November 2 to Joshua and Julisa. Weighing in at 6 pounds and 11 ounces, measuring 19 inches in length.
Simply stunning.

Sorry, but my kids are ridiculous

Originally uploaded by Monkey loves Kitten.

And you all have to look at them. I see them everyday (except when they're in jail) and I still think they are so funny. It's okay if you don't agree, I know how annoying moms can be. But, just in case, click here for a short slideshow.

Wow!

Ever since I hooked up with the garden club, my social calendar is hopping. They've picked me up to go to the gym the last two mornings, we're going to dinner and a show on Friday, and next Tuesday to a cooking demonstration. There's no Scrabble tomorrow, but we'll be back on next week. Unfortunately, I missed Mah Jongg last night, forgot all about it. Oh boy, I'm clearly going to have to start keeping my calendar on paper.

My new friends

Last Thursday I went to a meeting of the garden club and joined up for $15 per annum. It was an hour and a half of three dozen ladies talking about a number of things including, but most certainly not limited to, gardening. After that, I stayed for a game of Scrabble, lunch, and more Scrabble. It was a pretty fun day, I have to admit. And, it got me invited to a wine and hors d'oevres evening at one of the gal's places tonight. I was excited to have plans. I put on some slacks and a twin set and was ready a half hour early. The evening started at 5:30 so I had to bump up the evening dog walking/tooth brushing/feeding ritual an hour. I hitched a ride with some other neighborhood denizens and we arrived promptly. There were ten or twelve women there and plenty of food. A few hours later many of the party-goers suddenly left including my ride. Luckily, I'd met Sylvia, who also lives on my street, and she offered to give me a ride if I wanted to stay. And then it was 10:30. A good time. Thank you garden club!

Carolina evening

Just got back from walking the dogs. It's a beautiful evening and the smell of fireplaces burning and the glorious oranges, pinks, and blues of the sunset almost made up for the mosquitoes swarming around my head and the fact that Quentin had peed on Shane's head.

Add "snake killing" to the list...

... of unanticipated things to which getting married has led me.

Friday afternoon I pulled into the garage and saw something that required a second look. I pulled back out and discovered it was a snake. Just a little guy. A little guy with an immature rattle on the tip of his tail.

ALIVE.
Short of the long, I killed it. With my car. It was awful. I hated it. But the thought of it striking one of the dogs convinced me it was the thing to do. The only youngish male neighbor I know wasn't home and I really would have felt terrible if I killed one of the old people, so I dealt with it myself. After it was dead for a day, I took a picture and sent it to Brandon. He identified it as an Eastern Diamondback Rattlesnake. I looked 'em up, They are considered the most dangerous in North America. Also the rarest in North Carolina and important to the ecosystem and something that shouldn't be killed. Like I didn't feel crappy enough already. Man.

DEAD.

Happy Belated Dogoween!

I'm experimenting with a plan I have for the human children - shared costume. Why go crazy spending money on multiple Halloween costumes? That's money that can clearly be spent better on wine for mommy. Instead, buy one costume that's just big enough to stretch over the largest kid and split time between that kid and the other. Sure, it might be too big for the little kid, but the kids should really just consider themselves lucky they get a store bought costume at all. If they complain too much, we'll give 'em a pillow case, a marker, and some scissors. It was good enough for us, right? Click the link below to see the results of this year's trial.
Slideshow here.

P.S. These were actually taken yesterday afternoon. On Monday night, we were hiding inside, pretending we weren't home, eating all the candy ourselves. (Okay it was just me, but still.)

Afternoon puppy hands

I would be remiss

If I didn't tell you all about the innkeepers of the bed and breakfast my mom and I stayed at in Black Mountain. They are Susie and Walt Ward and man are they nice. They just opened in July after a very quick renovation following Walt's retirement and their move from Winston-Salem. They don't have any illusions of getting rich from their operation, they just really like it. They even both have part-time jobs in town to help pay the bills. And they did the most amazing thing. After they learned of Brandon's deployment, they gave me a gift certificate to come back with him for a weekend on them. Believe me, Susie and Walt, I can hardly wait to see you again.

Mountain Oaks Bed & Breakfast

Funny face in full effect

Birthday eve, no presents, so sad
Originally uploaded by Monkey loves Kitten.

Brandon sent an essay in photographs to illustrate the roller coaster of emotions his 31st birthday brought him. Click on this one to see the rest of the heartwrenching journey.

Oh, and in case you're wondering, this is what he had for dinner that day:

I had special birthday cheeseburger with an onion ring on it and some pickles and onion and a little bit of mayo and some thousand island dressing and it almost tasted like In and Out but not quite then I had some ice cream that was flavored like pralines with nuts and some caramel sauce and one tiiiiiiiny marshmallow on top! And water to drink. MMMMMMM

Pictures from Mom's visit

The boathouse at the Biltmore.
Originally uploaded by Monkey loves Kitten.

These are pictures from our drive west to Black Mountain, near Asheville. It had recently begun to get cold, later than usual, so the fall colors weren't in full array. It was still quite beautiful and we crammed in a lot of activities. After our drive on the Blue Ridge Parkway, we toured the Biltmore estate in Asheville. It was built for George Vanderbilt at the end of the 19th century. It is ridiculously huge. But pretty cool to walk through, it's true.

Letter to my husband

Happy birthday, Kitten! I hope that this day is good for you. As good as it can be, that is. Have an extra near beer on me.

A year ago, at your birthday party, you proposed to me on bended knee. It was a a wonderful moment and a terrific day. Even though we both knew it was coming, you were so nervous and I was so surprised. Some of our closest friends were there and everything was wonderful except the cheesecake I over-baked. The year since then has brought more changes than I could have known. By virtue of marrying you, I became a homeowner, an unemployed one to boot! I now live in the south and eat grits. I drove across country and saw many new places. I was lucky enough to spend a few hours in New Orleans. (I'm drinking coffee out of your Cafe du Monde mug right now.) I gained an incredible family and supportive friends. If a man can be judged by his family and friends, you are at the top.

The day you deployed was one of the hardest for me. I can't say it was the worst, though. You were in it. Your sister, Kim, thanked me for loving you the way I do. I thought a lot about that and realized I don't have a choice. If I did, this separation might be a little easier. But no, that's not the way it goes. I met you and I was a goner. Sure, you have your moments, but they are few and far between and currently nonexistent. And I know I've tested your patience once or twice. In the whole, you make me want to be better. Meeting you has taken me in a direction I never could have imagined and elicited traits and feelings in me that I didn't know possible. I feel like one of those sappy Blue Mountain greeting cards when I think about what this marriage means to me. A little embarrassing but not enough to stop me from telling you all this here. Because that's how much I love you! Sheesh. I just can't stop.

By my calculations, 38% of your tour has passed. I've tried not to think of how much time has elapsed and how much time is left. I'm buoyed a bit that more than a third is behind us. Hopefully the next time I figure it we'll be past the halfway mark.

I miss you terribly and I love you more than you know.

-Your Wife

Happy Birthday dear husband!

It's your Baskin-Robbins birthday, 31 flavors years. This is my attempt to show the 31 faces of Brandon. Don't worry, there aren't actually 31 pics, but our kind readers may just get the drift...
Wine tasting in Santa Ynez.Mr. CornEarsComparing baldnesses with Elizabeth.Cracking up Sammy, or being cracked up by Sammy.Gritty McGritterton.Getting an earful in Mexico.Kissing Georgia Foreman right on the lips.Enjoying tots in Texas.Nestling in.

Here's a taste

This is my favorite picture from Sunday's drive on part of the Blue Ridge Parkway. We wound up to Mt. Mitchell, the highest point east of the Mississippi. It was cold so cold up there, but not as cold as it is today. I heard this morning the Parkway was closed due to snow! Here's a live shot.

Gap

Sorry for the long pause between posts. Mom and I have been on many adventures - on one right now - and I'll tell you all about it when I get some time. We're in the town of Black Mountain, near Asheville. We drove up (altitude) here yesterday after checking the dogs into a new jail. Last night we walked around the tiny downtown then had a very nice dinner. And, ya know what? It was cold outside. I haven't been cold in months. I loved it. Mom not so much. So, we came out here for Fall color, which is late this year. We're not getting a full dose, but we don't really know any better.

More later including photgraphs. Commence oohing and aahing.

Hmmm

I just went to my "Now Playing" list in TiVo. I selected Saturday Night Live. I had to fast forward to 1:15 am before the show started. This was after the 11 o'clock news, which had started at 12:45. The news hadn't started until 12:45 because it was pushed back by NASCAR. That's right, NASCAR. Does this happen other places?

No one to blame but m'self

My mom got in last Thursday night. Friday we were out and about for a good deal of the day. We came home, fed the dogs, then went out to eat ourselves. Since I hadn't been gone in the evening for months, I felt kinda bad about leaving the dogs. I told them that if they were mad about being deserted, they could destroy something. I added the caveat that it should be something of theirs. Well, maybe I didn't say that part loudly enough. We came home to this.

It being my suggestion was only one of the reasons it was funny and Shane didn't get in trouble. Contributing to this were that it was a $1.99 pair of Old Navy flops and it was the first destructive act performed by Shane. Yes, I know it was her, and if I didn't that night, forensic evidence the next day confirmed it. Mmmm, rubber.

Photos from abroad

"SOOOOOPER tiny" lizard
Originally uploaded by Monkey loves Kitten.

Brandon sent this photo he took of a desert critter. Click on him for a few more shots.

Rain

Well, my mom arrived last Thursday evening, about an hour after the rain. It's Monday morning and they're both still here. That my mom is still here is not a surprise, I received a copy of her itinerary in advance. The rain was not so thoughtful. We received six inches Saturday, effectively putting New Bern's 25th Annual MumFest out of business. From what we could tell, we missed out on a craft fair, or as I like to call them - crap fair. Probably quite similar to Ventura's twice yearly downtown festival. In other words, a crowded street with overpriced food and yard decor we can certainly live without. Still, we were sorry to have the option taken away. I was looking forward to the excitement. Instead, I had the excitement of a leak in the roof causing damage to my bathroom ceiling. I am now very familiar with the attic and have become quite deft at climbing through the rafters and not falling through the ceiling. Of course the location of the leak is the total opposite side of the house from the attic access, so I kinda had to learn quickly. Long story short, the leak has been repaired. I'll need to get the ceiling fixed, but that's not urgent. Since we technically live in a townhome, the homeowners' association owns the outside so the repairs were on them. The kicker is the cause of the leak was a $5 piece of plastic. Good stuff.


All the rain caused some flooding in the area and added many water traps to the golf course. We saw a group of boys taking full advantage of a brand new watering hole on the green, splashing about and pulling out their skim boards. The next day it was gone, glad to see they seized the day.

Gas

You'll all be glad to know that the Fuel Market replaced it's canopy. Kind of makes me better about having the third most expensive gas in the nation. The average price here is $3.08 per gallon, only bested by Hawaii and D.C. Don't be jealous.

Once again, I did not get a picture

You know how there's this nationwide campaign to get people to buckle up? Around here, there are signs that have the seatbelt usage percentage for the current month, plus the highest percentage to date. I've seen some below 90%. Well, I was driving down the highway this afternoon, when I noticed a car pulling a flatbed trailer with a motorcycle in it. It was moving slowly so I changed lanes to pass. That's when I noticed that the bike was being held in place by a man. Probably something else also, but definitely a man sitting on the trailer holding the rear of the bike. I'm pretty sure he was actively reducing the percentage of seatbelt usage. As I passed, I saw that the '70s station wagon pulling the trailer was driven by a tiny old man on oxygen. I failed to note whether his seatbelt was fastened.

Skip the treeman

It's not a directive, it's a person. A person who is as big around as he is tall. The dogs and I met him and his Jack Russell Terrier last week while walking. We were walking, they were riding. His tree company was removing downed trees and limbs (I've been calling them branches - incorrectly. It's like that time I learned from the lamp salesman that they're not called light bulbs, they're called lamps.). According to the truck, they specialize in problem trees and stump grinding. Got an oak testing its limits? An impertinant pine? Call Skip. Well, Skip thought it was pretty funny to roll the window down so his JRT could bark at my dogs as Skip rolled slowly past us, three times. Finally, we came upon them after they'd stopped so we got to spend some time with Skip and his dog. She was a very friendly girl and promptly came over to the dogs to receive her due adoration. Skip was very interested in Quentin, thought he looked like a good squirrel dog. Told me he had twenty-five head of dog himself. Skip's buddy agreed about Quentin, thought he could get good money for him. There's good money in squirrel dogs they agreed. And that's when Skip took a long look at both my dogs and laughed and said, "Looks like they git plenty ta eat." So do you, Skip, so do you.

Still Life: Canine with Fungus 1

Still Life: Canine with Fungus 2